Monday, 14 April 2014

22 Signs You’re An Unemployed Graduate

You wake up and have time to extensively read your Twitter timeline


Once you’ve caught up on Twitter you have time to make something more substantial for breakfast than a cereal bar


When you turn on the television you immediately tune in to The Jeremy Kyle Show


Once that’s over you decide it’s time for a well-earned nap


After a quick browse through Buzzfeed’s latest lists


You wake up from your hour long nap and discover that there is a cooking feature on This Morning


Which makes you hungry so you go and look in the fridge


Except there isn’t much so you put on your trainers and hoodie and head to the shops


You can’t be bothered to cook and suddenly McDonald’s seems appetising


You tell yourself that at £4.09 a medium Big Mac meal doesn’t hit your tight finances too hard


After wolfing down your meal and suddenly feeling sick, you decide it’s time to head home and look for a job


But things get in the way such as YouTube


And you find you’ve spent the last hour watching cat videos


There’s a heap of new albums to listen to on Spotify


Suddenly you’re parents/siblings/flat-mates are home from work/school/university


And you just have to watch Pointless first


Then a mate texts you asking if you fancy a pint


You tell yourself it’s a nice evening so it’d be rude not to


One pint turns into two which turns into three


You leave the pub for a club


Seven pints, three tequilas and a shot of vodka later you return home



Only to repeat the same cycle the next day

(c) giphy.com

Follow Me On Twitter @Alex_Harris1991

No comments:

Post a Comment